Ring Lardner Quotations

This story is slightly immoral, but so, I guess, are stories based on truth

They (wives) are people who think when the telephone bell rings, it is against the law not to answer it

Although he is a very poor fielder, he is a very poor hitter.

He give her a look that you could of poured on a waffle

There isn't anything on earth as depressing as an old sportswriter.

Walter Mayer was a hero at a Salvation Army home fire in Cincinnati.

I've known what it is to be hungry, but I always went right to a restaurant.

An optimist is a girl who mistakes a bulge for a curve.

No one, ever, wrote anything as well even after one drink as he would have done with out it.

A good many young writers make the mistake of enclosing a stamped, self-addressed envelope, big enough for the manuscript to come back in. This is too much of a temptation to the editor.