Shonda Rhimes Quotations

When people show you who they are, believe them. I carry that with me a lot. It has served me well.

I actually like being alone. I spend most evenings reading and taking long baths.

Writing for television is completely different from movie scriptwriting. A movie is all about the director's vision, but television is a writer's medium.

I don't understand why people don't understand that the world of TV should look like the world outside of TV.

I think I'm most proud of the fact that I have figured out how to exist as both a creative person and artist, and a businesswoman and manager. Because those two things do not go together.

When the press began asking me for interviews, I freaked out. My instinct is to hide.

I've learned this is a very long marriage doing a television show. I like the people that I work with to be people I enjoy, so you want to cast people who are as excited and enthusiastic as you are.

Calling a show a 'guilty pleasure' is like saying 'I'm embarrassed to say I watch it but I can't stop.' That's not a compliment.

You can't tell stories and really walk in someone's shoes and not have a love for them, even if they're doing horrible things.

Most of the women I saw on TV didn't seem like people I actually knew. They felt like ideas of what women are.

I can feel it when there's too much medical and not enough personal, and that's the most important balance to keep. We've done episodes where there's a ton of personal and not very much medical. Works just fine. But when the medical sort of overtakes the personal, the show doesn't feel like the show.

For us, not having a time slot last year, and now all of you watching ... has been great.

What I find interesting is that there are some people out there who take the show very seriously. But then I think about how strongly I felt about 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' and how emotional I was about what happened to those characters. So going from being a fan to somebody who has her own show, I definitely respect it. You come into people's homes in a very personal way on a weekly basis. They get involved. But the general success of the show, that sort of loyalty and rage over why did you let Meredith and George sleep together, it's fantastic but it's not something I necessarily expected.

This isn't a traditional medical drama. I've always said from the beginning, we're a relationship show with surgery. It's never about the patients. It's about how the doctors feel about the patients.

The Web allows people to know our names and what we look like. As a writer, you don't expect to be recognizable to anybody. And it's certainly not your goal. But I spent so much time wishing to have the show, and wishing that it would be a success, that I certainly can't complain about anything that happens after that. The viewers feel a little bit a part of the writer's room in that sense.

It's about surgery. It's our show sort of on speed.

It meant we could have two leading men and two leading men in very different ways.

It's that time in your life when you literally don't know if what you're going to do is going to work or not, what your future is, if you're going to make it.

It's still definitely 'Grey's Anatomy.' I don't think it's anything like that other show. We do surgeries. It's about surgery. It's our show sort of on speed, I guess.

It's incredibly encouraging that our viewers haven't gotten hung up on the race thing. It's not about the fact that she's Asian and he's black. It's about the fact that she's a slob, and he's a neat freak. That's what the whole relationship is all about.

It worked out extremely well. The 10th episode was an incredibly strong episode to start out the season. So it was really easy for us to end the season on that ninth episode and start up again on that tenth without missing a beat.

They wouldn't shut up about it. 'He's totally an alcoholic and here's why.' I hate them sometimes. Especially when they are right. Because Richard is totally an alcoholic and now I see why.

I'm a post-Civil Rights baby. I'm not trying to make a point. This is just the way the world looks now.

If you haven't seen the show, it's very easy to figure out what's going on. The stories that are there, the relationships that are there are very clear.

I planned the episode knowing that it was possible that it could be the Super Bowl episode, but also knowing that we would do the episode whether or not it was on Super Bowl Sunday.

Being after 'Desperate Housewives' has allowed a large number of people to discover our show. But they stay and come back each week because these characters feel like people you know. And no matter what race they are, you see yourself in their problems.

I don't see myself lessening the narration for Meredith. Meredith is wonderful and she's got a great voice and it's lovely to see the world through a specific set of eyes. That's important to the show.

I really don't think there's a world in which you can do anything with anybody. Because we're in the world of the White House, I think there are certain things you can do, and larger things that can happen, but I don't think you can do anything.

You literally can shoot someone in the face on television and a 7-year-old can watch it. But you can't show the slight of a man's hip, because dear God, someone might think of sex. And while we all hope our kids grow up to have sex, we do not hope they grow up to shoot someone in the face.

I am terrible with examples. I can never think of them when anybody asks for an example.

A hashtag is not helping. A hashtag is not a movement. A hashtag does not make you Dr King. A hashtag does not change anything. It's a hashtag.

I never, ever pay attention to the ratings. I stopped paying attention to the ratings somewhere around season two or three of Grey's. It's something I have no control over, so I don't even pay attention.

I think it's sad, and weird, and strange that [race in casting] is still a thing. It's 2013. Somebody else needs to get their act together.

I was 4 and dictating stories into a tape recorder, and my mom typed them up.

Yes, it is hard out there. But hard is relative. I come from a middle-class family, my parents are academics. I was born after the Civil Rights movement, I was a toddler during the women's movement, I live in the United States of America, all of which means I am allowed to own my freedom, my rights, my voice and my uterus.

I don't know if anyone has noticed but I only ever write about one thing: being alone. The fear of being alone, the desire to not be alone, the attempts we make to find our person, to keep our person, to convince our person to not leave us alone, the joy of being with our person and thus no longer alone, the devastation of being left alone. The need to hear the words: You are not alone.

I remember saying, very almost jokingly, I'm going to take over the world through television, that's my plan. And I said it to my agent, and I said it to my friends, and I said it to myself.

Everyone always says to me, 'Why aren't there more people of color on television?' I'm like, 'Why don't you ask a bunch of people who aren't putting people of color on television why there aren't more people of color on television?'

I want my daughters to see me and know me as a woman who works. I want that example set for them. I am a better mother for it. The woman I am because I get to run Shondaland, because I get write all day, because I get to spend my days making things up, that woman is a better person  - and a better mother. Because that woman is happy. That woman is fulfilled. That woman is whole. I wouldn't want them to know the me that didn't get to do this all day long. I wouldn't want them to know the me who wasn't doing.

Nobody ever asks a man how he gets stuff done. Nobody asks a man how he finds balance.

At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, it's usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to remain close to, and once we've chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them. The people that are still with you at the end of the day, those are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need.

I happen to like debating, and I like to debate like a lawyer, and I can argue any points to death, and I will.

Whenever you see me somewhere succeeding in one area of my life, that almost certainly means I am failing in another area of my life.

Nobody got anything great by playing it safe.

I'm a black woman every day, and I'm not confused about that. I'm not worried about that. I don't need to have a discussion with you about how I feel as a black woman, because I don't feel disempowered as a black woman.

My parents created a world in which the only ­barrier to your success is your own imagination.

Mother is a verb, not a noun.

We all think we’re going to be great and we feel a little bit robbed when our expectations aren’t met. But sometimes our expectations sell us short. Sometimes the expected simply pales in comparison to the unexpected. You got to wonder why we cling to our expectations, because the expected is just what keeps us steady. Standing. Still. The expected's just the beginning, the unexpected is what changes our lives.

Making it through the ceiling to the other side was simply a matter of running on a path created by every other woman's footprints.

You are not alone. You are seen. I am with you. You are not alone.

We spend our whole lives worrying about the future, planning for the future, trying to predict the future, as if figuring it out will cushion the blow. But the future is always changing. The future is the home of our deepest fears and wildest hopes. But one thing is certain when it finally reveals itself. The future is never the way we imagined it

There's a reason I said I'd be happy alone. It wasn't 'cause I thought I'd be happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart, I might not make it. It's easier to be alone. Because what if you learn that you need love and then you don't have it? What if you like it and lean on it? What if you shape your life around it and then it falls apart? Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage. It's like dying. The only difference is death ends. This? It could go on forever.

Cynicism is a choice. Optimism is a better choice.

You never know the biggest day of your life is your biggest day, not until it’s happening. You don’t recognize the biggest day of your life, not until you’re right in the middle of it. The day you commit to something or someone. The day you get your heart broken. The day you meet your soul mate. The day you realize there’s not enough time because you wanna live forever. Those are the biggest days. The perfect days.

Finally I want to say this: if you are a kid and you are out there and you are chubby and not so cute and nerdy and shy and invisible and in pain, whatever your race, whatever your gender, whatever your sexual orientation, I’m standing here to tell you: you are not alone. Your tribe of people, they are out there in the world. Waiting for you.

Ive learned this is a very long marriage doing a television show. I like the people that I work with to be people I enjoy, so you want to cast people who are as excited and enthusiastic as you are.

Mother is not a title. Mother is a verb. It is not who you are. It's what you do.

Perfect is boring and dreams are not real. Just do. So you think, “I wish I could travel.” Great. Sell your crappy car, buy a ticket to Bangkok, and go. Right now. I'm serious.

The only limit to success is your own imagination.

You want to be a writer? A writer is someone who writes every day, so start writing. You don't have a job? Get one. Any job. Don't sit at home waiting for the magical opportunity. Who are you? Prince William? No. Get a job. Go to work. Do something until you can do something else.

Ditch the dream and be a doer.

It can be scary to find out you've been wrong about something but we can't be afraid to change our minds, to accept that things are different, that they'll never be the same, for better or for worse. We have to be willing to give up what we used to believe. The more we're willing to accept what is and not what we thought, we'll find ourselves exactly where we belong.

I think a lot of people dream. And while they are busy dreaming, the really happy people, the really successful people, the really interesting, engaged, powerful people, are busy doing.

Boundaries don't keep other people out, they fence you in.

Maybe you know exactly what it is you dream of being, or maybe you're paralyzed because you have no idea what your passion is. The truth is, it doesn't matter. You don't have to know. You just have to keep moving forward. You just have to keep doing something, seizing the next opportunity, staying open to trying something new.

There is no longer one way to consume TV. Some shows you want to watch live, some shows you only discover through streaming, some shows you just feel you need to DVR.

The expected is what keeps us steady. It's the unexpected that changes our lives forever.

At some point, you have to make a decision. Boundaries don't keep other people out. They fence you in. Life is messy. That's how we're made. So, you can waste your lives drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them

This moment right here, me standing up here all brown with my boobs and my Thursday night of network television full of women of color, competitive women, strong women, women who own their bodies and whose lives revolve around their work instead of their men, women who are big dogs, that could only be happening right now.

I cannot keep track and lots of great shows go unnoticed.

You can waste your lives drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them.

Dreams are lovely. But they are just dreams. Fleeting, ephemeral, pretty. But dreams do not come true just because you dream them. It's hard work that makes things happen. It's hard work that creates change.

The best stories are often true...The narrative of human life is most beautiful when told truthfully and without boundaries.

You could. And I think it says that's bad and it's black and it's a code, honestly.