Russell Brand Funny Quotations

I used to binge-eat and make myself throw up. I was a fat kid. Obviously I didn't quite master the bulimia.

When you bump into your own mom at an orgy, it's hard not to get her to read into certain things.

If your body is 90% water what have you got to drink water all the time for? Why can't you just have some crisps?

Amy Winehouse - her surname's beginning to sound like a description of her liver.

Even in name, he seems like a Victorian oddity. "Igor, fetch 'the Crouch' from the catacombs, we're going to the graveyard".

How long is it polite to continue to be interested in what someone says after they reveal they've got a boyfriend?

On respect for the Queen: When I lick a stamp I always do it with my eyes closed.

I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough.