Stephen Colbert Guests Quotations

Late-night shows are 'Chopped.' Who are your guests tonight? Your guests tonight are veal tongue, coffee grounds and gummy bears. There, make a show ... Make an appetizer that appeals to millions of people. That's what I like. How could you possibly do it? Oh, you bring in your own flavors. Your own house band is another flavor.

I'm just very interested in what my guests have to say. You have to be vigilant to stay ignorant.

My guest Newt Gingrich shut down the government during the Clinton administration. I'll ask him when it's gonna start working again.