Funny Motivational Quotations

Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.

I cannot afford to waste my time making money

Sometimes, Chelsea, I wonder, how you get by from day to day. It's a good thing you're so voluptuous.

Pressure is something you feel when you do not know what you are doing.

Just because I rock doesn't mean I am made of stone.

It's hard to get lost if you don't know where you're going.

Don't mind your make-up, you'd better make your mind up.

I say if you love something, set it in a small cage and pester and smother it with love until it either loves you back or dies.

You're at your best when you don't know what you're doing.

Even a stopped clock is right twice every day. After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes.

The key to success is not through achievement, but through enthusiasm.

It's a great lesson about not being too precious about your writing. You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke you can until the last possible second, and then you have to let it go. You can't be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it...You have to let people see what you wrote.

So, my unsolicited advice to women in the workplace is this. When faced with sexism, or ageism, or lookism, or even really aggressive Buddhism, ask yourself the following question: “Is this person in between me and what I want to do?” If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. Your energy is better used doing your work and outpacing people that way. Then, when you’re in charge, don’t hire the people who were jerky to you.

The elevator to success is out of order, but the stairs are always open.

Don't put off until tomorrow what you can do today.

Never follow anyone else's path, unless you're in the woods and you're lost.

Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.

I don’t know where I am going, but I am on my way.

I know worrying works, because none of the stuff I worried about ever happened.