Toilet Quotations

I decided to build a studio in my house. We built it in my basement kitchen. I had the drummer up by the fish tank. I was in the toilet singing. The bass player was out by the shelves in the living room, and the guitarist was on the couch by the telly.

My goal is that after seeing 'Grand Canyon,' every person in the audience will go home knowing they have to conserve water: even something as simple as installing a low-flow toilet or showerhead, or turning off the faucet while they're brushing their teeth.

I am proud to say that I plastic-wrapped Bruno Ricci's toilet in his trailer.

You can almost judge how screwed up somebody is by the kind of toilet paper they use. Go in any rich house and it's some weird coloured embossed stuff.

Rules governing defecation, hygiene, and pollution exist in every culture at every period in history. It may in fact be the foundation of civilization: What is toilet training if not the first attempt to turn a child into an acceptable member of society?

Cancer is a great wake-up call. A call to take the tag off the new lingerie and wear that black lacy slip. To open the box of pearls and put them on. To crack open the bath oil beads before they shrivel up in a bowl on the toilet tank.

I'm way better in person than I am on things like Twitter. I know Twitter is the best and fastest way to connect with fans who really appreciate you but I'm still not cool with it - although I am trying! I try my best but I'm a one-on-one person and I don't want to tell people I'm on the toilet or I just brushed my teeth.

Don't let yourself fall into 'empty.' Keep cash in the house. Keep gas in your tank. Keep an extra roll of toilet paper squirreled away. Keep your phone charged.

When I was writing my dissertation, I wrote about Freud and the process of sublimation, which is when you learn to stop breast-feeding, or stop going to the toilet whenever you want to. It's about learning to repress a desire for instant gratification.

I'm shy. I can go on a trip for days and not go because I won't sit on a toilet seat on a plane. I'm certainly not going to go on somebody's lawn. Could you imagine, in a cocktail dress?

I always said if I could figure out a way to grow Kleenex and toilet paper on trees, we could pull the plug on society.

In the case of the classic Western helicopter parent, it starts with Baby Einstein and reward charts for toilet training, and it never really ends, which is why colleges have to devote so many resources to teaching parents how to leave their kids alone.

We are all shopping in the same stores, so if someone hoards the toilet paper, there's less for us.

Looks like the grill to the fan has fallen off, it's behind the toilet here.

She sat there and consciously made the decision to sit there for 10 minutes while the baby laid inside the toilet. Moments later she then used a pair of scissors to remove the child's umbilical cord, and then waited an additional 10 minutes before pulling the child out of the toilet and wrapping her in a towel.

One flush of today's Western toilet would provide enough water for washing, cooking and eating for one person in a developing country.

One time I was taking a little too long in the toilet and Mr. Zanuck sent for me. And he said, what are you doing that takes so long?

maybe humans are just the pet alligators that Gd flushed down the toilet

On the last day of the Edgbaston Test, I made the ultimate sacrifice of leaving the room when Australia needed six to win. On the 'going to the toilet in the pub to enable your team to score a goal' principle, I, personally, induced the England victory. My contribution is yet to be officially acknowledged.

On marrying Freddie Prinze Jr: He grew up with women so he leaves the toilet seat up.

If this keeps up, our quality of life is going in the toilet and they are getting filthy rich.

I don't have to take showers with other women anymore. I don't have to flush a toilet somebody left something in before I use it. I can sleep when I want to.

I live with three boys, and I can't tell you how hard it is to get your hands on toilet paper. They steal it.

The purpose of the fund is to invest in habit-forming small ticket items which people think they can't live without, ... That turns out to (include) liquor and tobacco. But that's not it. I hate to tell you. The No. 1 habit-forming commodity is toilet paper.

We managed to patch up Scott McLean although he was at the toilet all night. We have only 16 players, but our lads play with passion and for each other.

Kenny went in to use the rest room, and they had the toilet paper roll with the springs on the side, and he kept pulling the paper, and it kept breaking off. He said he pulled and pulled and pulled, and it broke and broke and broke, and the whole time this toilet paper is breaking off I'm in the truck and we're gone. We thought he was there.

Just the other day I was talking to the mother of a bride I married some time ago and she told me her daughter still has her toilet rolls,

It gets real costly if all of a sudden we have to buy toilet paper. Stuff like milk and meat can run thousands of dollars a year.

It is never okay to use the toilet with the door open...I never want to know what comes out of there because sometimes I eat at that resturant.

I went to the toilet in Saturday's match with (Tommy) Haas because I was tired and not feeling too great,

Paris's neighborhoods, the arrondissements, are organized like a twist. They spiral from the river like toilet water flushing in reverse and erupting out of the bowl - a corkscrew or what have you, a flattened pig's tail, a whorling braid notched one to 20.

Just about anything anybody can use, we give out free from toilet paper on up. I feel like God sent me here. Jerry helped me raise my four kids when I lived in Longview Place and St. John's Lutheran School was nearby.

We pulled toilet rooms out towards the hallway. That puts the patient zone further away from the corridor to cut down on noise, and then when janitors come to clean the rest rooms they don't have to come all the way into the room and it's less disturbing to patients.

The one thing you don't want to happen is that you start talking about common systems, for example, and you get the gold-plated toilet out the other end.

We are going to train the toilet cleaner to upgrade himself or herself to a level where he or she can take care of the entire toilet, including changing bulbs, repairing locks, repairing leaky taps, doing periodical heavy cleaning, technical cleaning, taking away urine salt inside the toilet and recommending change to the toilet layout,

We are going to train the toilet cleaners to upgrade himself or herself to a level where he or she can take care of the entire toilet, including changing bulbs, repairing locks, repairing leaky taps, doing periodical heavy cleaning, technical cleaning, taking away urine salt inside the toilet and recommending changes to the toilet layout.

Why SCOTT Tissue? We've been bringing consumers common-sense solutions for more than a century. None of us like it when true toilet terror strikes and, by providing practical solutions to avoid clogs, we help ourselves and our plumbing community.

Well, where do we get our paper? Where do we get our toilet paper? The best thing that you can do to help out is to be very conservative. Don't waste a lot of paper.

Unfortunately I had to leave my favorite paper supplier because their toilet paper costs went out of control.

We're the largest portable toilet company operating in Lee County. We have a little over 8,000 of them and I don't have any inventory of any kind.

We've got uniforms pants, boots, t-shirts, underwear and toilet supplies,

We gave away a $5,200 toilet. It's just the most fantastic toilet you could ever imagine. It has an infrared signal. It has hoses and vacuums and all kinds of implements that attend to every possible need.

Toilet paper all over the floor. Bodies. Babies dying in front of your face,

Toilet and a bed. There'll be other prisoners in that little quad, and sometimes they'll communicate by shouting back and forth to each other.

Even if we were well treated the most humiliating situation was going to the toilet because we had to ask permission. And then later there weren't even any toilets.

Crystal dressed up as a mummy for Halloween by wrapping herself with toilet paper and ace bandages.

There's a deep underlying unpredictability to life that is thrilling. In China, my wife would say you go out to buy toilet paper, and you come back, and something interesting or revealing or funny happened on the way.

There's four of us, two teenagers. We have to time our showers. At five in the morning my teenager does hers and so on because as soon as you get in there the toilet starts bubbling. I'm worried it's going to go over,

The Yankees buy titles instead of building championships. I wouldn't use this for toilet paper.

Psychiatry's chief contribution to philosophy is the discovery that the toilet is the seat of the soul.

After shopping for one or two hours, customers want to visit the toilet and if toilet not good, they leave the building. And they leave with their impulse buying. Impulse buying accounts for 95% of purchases,

Now, as husbands go, I have to admit I did all right. Joe is unquestionably handsome, doesn't leave ragged toenail clippings scattered about the house, and has never once, in nearly five thousand days of togetherness, left the toilet seat up.

Coach was not happy with us. He told us we just need to flush this (game) down the toilet and forget about it.

A principal in Oregon was having problems with some girls in the school. The girls had just started to wear lipstick and were pressing their lips against the mirror. After a few weeks, when the culprits were caught, the principal wanted to teach them a lesson, so the custodian showed them what he had to do to clean the lipstick. He dipped the sponge into the toilet and proceeded to wipe the mirror. Needless to say, the girls never pressed their lips against that mirror again.

A typical toilet will use four gallons of water per flush ... a water-saving toilet will use less than two.

You're much more likely to be attacked by lightning or by your own toilet than you are by a shark,

They put this Darth Vader mask on his face, it was like some Rube Goldberg thing glued to this guy. It covered his face like a toilet seat. It was connected to a machine that I swear you could run a swimming pool on, and it sounded like a freight train.

All of our egos were flushed down the toilet after that game. We were knocked down from riding that high horse.

The average human being spends three years of life going to the toilet, though the average human being with no physical toilet to go to probably does his or her best to spend less. It is a human behavior that is as revealing as any other about human nature, but only if it can be released from the social straitjacket of nicety.

That Florida kid or that Georgia kid, I'd have them clean a toilet just as quick I would any other kid who doesn't have a college home (next year),

I've had to go to a friends to get a shower. Laundry piled up. dishes piled up. Can't even flush my toilet without water from someone else to flush my toilet.

It's very important the toilet be beautiful, that this stage is reflected. If a child suffers trauma, then he will have adult neuroses.

They caught all the toilet paper and paper products on fire in the bathroom. They lost the whole building, a $10,000 structure that was destroyed.

There's the famous Southwest toilet paper race. Passengers pass the roll as fast as they can from front to back without breaking it.

I was 6-6, 240 pounds and didn't look like a very nice guy out there so nobody ever threw a racial slur at me. There were some things that happened a couple of times to my teammates, and I came to their rescue, but nobody ever said anything to me. I had a bald head, never smiled?they wanted no part of me. There was one scene in the movie where one of our players is beaten up in a restaurant bathroom and his head gets shoved in the toilet, but that never happened. If anybody would've stuffed one of my guys heads in the toilet like that, they wouldn't have lived to tell about it. There's nothing Haskins or anybody else could've said to stop me from doing something really bad to those guys. Again, that's the movie stuff. Good for dramatics, but I'd never let that happen.

Any walk through a park that runs between a double line of mangy trees and passes brazenly by the ladies toilet is invariably known as ''Lover's Lane.''

I left Israel to work as a model, to just make money - I didn't care if I was doing an ad for toilet paper or diapers, I just really wanted to allow myself to go to school, to go to university without waitressing, because when I'm in a school environment I just really like to study and have the best grades and learn as much as I can.

I never expected to go to college. Nobody in my high school went to college. We had half-pound rations of meat and of cooking oil. Matches were rationed. Toilet paper was rationed.

In any given year more than a thousand people will be maimed by toilet bowl cleaning products or killed by cattle. Less than a dozen will be attacked by a great white shark.

I have two brain cells left, and one of them is busy reminding me to buy toilet paper.

Individuals interested in donating can call The Bridge. We do still need food, paper products, money, cleaning supplies - if people could call and coordinate donations. People loved donating clothing to The Bridge - it was an avenue; if they could put their focus on collecting cleaning supplies - toilet paper, food etc. - these items are a priority.

I'm a writer who stacks cat food for a living. It's true: I have a master's degree in creative writing, I've published two critically successful books, and I get paid to replenish the shelves of my local food co-op with pet food, sponges and toilet paper. Nine days out of 10, I do it quite happily.

I once heard an adult ask another adult if her daughter was in STAND. One adult responded by saying, she was until her daughter was asked to bring in a roll of toilet tissue. The mom said it was too much, too embarrassing. I was so sad to hear this response from an adult. It was such a teachable moment about social responsibility, compassion and empathy.

Before you rip off three feet of toilet paper, consider that each year 500,000 acres of virgin boreal forest in northern Alberta and Ontario are being clear-cut to make the stuff. These forests are home to some 500 First Nation communities, as well as caribou and bears, moose and wolves, and, in the summertime, billions of songbirds.

How am I supposed to use the open toilet while all my colleagues are around me watching? Is this the humanity you claim to have? If you are trying to humiliate me, then keep in mind that nothing can humiliate Saddam.

If I'm sitting on the toilet and I'm looking at the grouting on the tiles, that grouting really gets me. Mothers have a thing about grouting.

I can only state that the toilet cassette was empty at pick up.

Deco, ... I have one at home, I used it for a toilet paper holder.