Bobby Heenan Quotations

There's nothing better than a good, blind referee.

The money's the same, whether you earn it or scam it.

I know all about cheating. I've had six very successful marriages.

If you're poor and you do something stupid, you're nuts. If you're rich and do something stupid, you're eccentric.

North Dakota State. What do you have to do there to graduate? Milk a cow with your left hand?

I'm a legend in this sport. If you don't believe me, ask me

I'd love to be popular in Barcelona. That sounds like a fun job

There's the downtown area of Tupelo. Did you see the skyscrapers? Two stories.

There's only two kinds of music I don't like... Country and Western.

Are there any swamps in Oklahoma? Yes, there is. It's called Tulsa.

Have you ever been to Glens Falls? The city limits signs are on the same post.

Hawaii's the 50th state? I thought it was a suburb of Guam.

I don't look at myself as a hero or smart person. I have a seventh-grade education, but I've had a lot of fun.

You can win, it'll just cost you some money.

You'd have a good voice, if it ever came out of your throat

I think women's wrestling has had a hard time because of GLOW. When GLOW came out, it looked like somebody was ripping off the male industry. Everybody made fun of it. WOW is a great product. It's produced right. It's got a little story line, and it's got good-looking girls who can work and can talk.

Its a dog eat dog world, and Mr. Perfect is a Milk Bone.

Everyone should have cancer one time - then you'd know that other things aren't important. The guy that gives you the finger at the stoplight don't mean nothing anymore. You come home and something's cold, or you didn't get something in the mail. Big deal. You want to get up every day and see your family and your friends.

I would like to do commercials, or even work for WWE if they called me. I wouldn't want to go back on the air or manage again, but I would like to be a spokesperson and do stuff like that.

WCW wasn't what I thought it should be. I thought it could be better. I would make suggestions, but nobody would want to hear them. They think you want their job. Please. It would be easier doing their job because they're used to doing nothing.

Its amazing that Lou Ferrigno can talk with fifty pounds of cracker in his mouth.

What are you doing, looking at me with one eye and chasing a fly with the other?

There's only two kinds of music I don't like....Country and Western.

He's the only man I know of who can hide his own easter eggs.

This (Paris,France) wouldn't be a bad place, but it's full of Frenchmen.

The bad thing about the Bushwhackers is that win, lose, or draw, you gotta have everything you got on fumigated.

If you ever had your moon salted you'd know how painful that could be.

Obviously some cheap motel is missing a shower curtain.

He's not pointing to anybody, he's showing off how high he can count!

You're 83? Really? You don't look it. I would've guessed 81 or 82.

Oh, I knew he was gonna do that. I just knew he was gonna do that. He don't need Jannetty. I told you that off and on.

I heard a rumor that your mom and dad ran away from home.

They're living proof that the 3 stooges had children.

Just look at the way he hangs in mid air!

Once you wrestke Rikki Atakki, an hour later you want to wrestle him again.

When's the last time you went into a barber shop and saw everyone there unconsious?

You don't have to yell at me Schiavone. I'm not blind!

He looks like something that fell out of a deck of cards!

When The Phenoix Suns are missing two basketballs, they'll know where to look!

Stu Hart trained all his kids--only three of them use the litter box.

Remember folks, fish are like relatives. After two days, they stink.

I asked Stu Hart earlier. I said, 'Stu, you gotta be proud of your boys.' He said, 'I have boys?'

It's very hard to get out of this hold, that's why you either have to scoot backwards, move forwards, or try to get up.

Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire. They're a lovely twosome, or threesome, or foursome, or twenty-fifthsome.

And for those of you that dropped out of high school, remember the famous phrase: 'Do you want fries with that?'

I once asked him what came at the end of the sentence... and he said "parole".

[On Sting] He threw a sucker punch. There's the sucker who threw the punch. Him the the Bart Simpson hair doo.

By the time The Iron Sheik gets to the ring, it will be Wrestlemania 37!

The two things that scare me most about wrestling fans is that they're allowed to vote and allowed to reproduce.

Janetty tried to dive through the window to escape, what an act of cowardice.

To Jim Duggan, taking a shower is a high risk maneuver.

There's a counter for every hold and a hold for every counter, and a lunch counter for every person that you know Schivone.

Tito Santana is like a cue-ball. The more you strike him, the more english you get out of him.

This guy makes coffee nervous.

Koko B. Ware … his mom’s first name was Tupper.

You know they say money can't buy happiness. Give me 50 bucks and watch me smile

You win some and you lose some. Unless you're Virgil, then you lose them all.