Polly Berrien Berends Quotations

Parenthood always comes as a shock. Postpartum blues? Postpartum panic is more like it. We set out to have a baby; what we get is a total take-over of our lives.

We do not have to get our children to learn; only to allow and encourage them in their learning. We do not have to dictate what they should learn; only to discern and respond to what it is that they are learning. Such responsiveness is at once the most educational and the most loving.

More than what we say or do, the way we are expresses what we think it means to be alive. So the articulate parent is less a telling than a listening individual.

The child does not begin to fall until she becomes seriously interested in walking, until she actually begins walking. Falling is thus more an indication of learning than a sign of failure.

A sense of worthiness is a child's most important need.

We can see that the baby is as much an instrument of nourishment to us, as we are for him.

Most of us would do more for our babies than we have ever been willing to do for anyone, even ourselves.

Everything that happens is either a blessing, which is also a lesson, or a lesson which is also a blessing.

My list of things I never pictured myself saying when I pictured myself as a parent has grown over the years.

A child needs both to be hugged and unhugged. The hug lets her know she is valuable. The unhug lets her know that she is viable. If you're always shoving your child away, they will cling to you for love. If you're always holding them closer, they will cling to you for fear.