Richard Armour Quotations

Children are supposed to help hold a marriage together. They do this in a number of ways. For instance, they demand so much attention that a husband and wife, concentrating on their children, fail to notice each other's faults.

Some people can carry a tune, but they seem to stagger under the load.

I love a finished speaker, I really, truly do I don't mean one who's polished, I just mean one who's through.

Good sportsmanship we hail, we sing, It's always pleasant when you spot it. There's only one unhappy thing: You have to lose to prove that you've got it.

When it comes to eating, you can sometimes help yourself more by helping yourself less.

A rumor is one thing that gets thicker instead of thinner as it is spread.

I've suffered from all of the hang-ups known, and none is as bad as the telephone.

Middle age is the time of life that a man first notices in his wife.

If only I kept my eye on the ball, Looking downward as does the pro there, I might not see where it was going, at all, But there might be a chance it would go there.

If I ever make a hole in one, A thrill that I've never known, I won't be believed and I'll have no fun, For I'm sure to be playing alone.