Gracie Allen Quotations

A young boy shouldn't be given up for hopeless just because he's lazy, surly, and good for nothing. Don't be discouraged by those things - maybe he's just trying to be like his daddy.

It's foolish to bet on a horse without talking to him first. I know it seems silly to ask a horse who's going to win a race - but it's no sillier than asking anyone else.

You've buttered your bread, now sleep in it.

Cultivate friendships. If you don't have time to cultivate all of them, plow under every fifth one and collect your bonus.

Every politician must be able to keep both feet on the fence with his ear to the ground.

When you learn to make everybody happy, you will possess the golden secret of how to milk the contented voters. But do it in such a way that they won't think you want them to vote for you just because you need the money.They need the money, and besides, they can think up other reasons if they try.

Brains, integrity, and force may be all very well, but what you need today is Charm. Go ahead and work on your economic programs if you want to, I'll develop my radio personality.

As a well-known great man would have said if he had thought of it, "Don't go around offending people just because it can be done sitting down.

You kissed me like that when I was a blushing bride ...? I wonder what I was blushing about?

Try to understand me. Nothing is impossible.