Wilson Mizner Men Quotations

It is criminal negligence to leave suckers lying around to tempt honest men.

He's the only man I ever knew who had rubber pockets so he could steal soup.

A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.

Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.

To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.