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When I was one day old, I learned how to read. When I was two days old, I started to write. By the time I was three, I had finished 212 short stories, 38 novels, 730 poems, and one very funny limerick, all before breakfast. Jon Scieszka
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When I was in New York, I got to see Joan Rivers do an hour of material, and it blew my mind. I don't remember how old she was at the time, but she just had this edgy hour that had so much funny stuff in it, and she was so fearless. If you only watch her on the red carpet, you don't get a sense of what a legendary standup comedian she is. Chelsea Peretti
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When I was in improv workshops or doing stand-up or writing comedy with others, or just doing comedy, I just laughed. Funny was funny; I loved to laugh. I always liked people I found generally funny. Michael Keaton
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When I was in high school, there was 'Superbad' and 'The Girl Next Door' and 'Wedding Crashers' and all these great movies. You hope to be a part of something that's smart, funny and in that Todd Phillips-vein. You want to make something like 'Superbad.' That movie was so good and so funny. Miles Teller
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When I was in high school, I was a bad singer. I mean, all my early acting was musical theater, and my first ever show was 'Jesus Christ Superstar.' Everyone's familiar with it. I played priest number 3 and sang so out of tune that it's not even funny. Sam Claflin
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When I was a kid I had this funny blond hair and everyone called me 'Chick' because I looked like Tweety Bird. Nicky Hilton
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When I was a child, I always wanted to be funny and to please people in my family. As you grow up that instinct becomes more refined, but it's still there. Romola Garai
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When I appear in public, people expect me to neigh, grind my teeth, paw the ground and swish my tail - none of which is easy. Princess Anne
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Golf seems to me an arduous way to go for a walk. I prefer to take the dogs out.
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We've asked for all Texas officials to keep an accurate accounting of costs that are directly related to the relief effort so that we can ensure these are reimbursed." () Steve McCraw
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We're sorry. We need to treat our visitors with class. But at the same time it's 105,000 people in a highly emotionally charged time frame. And there were a lot of Texas fans who had a great experience.
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We found that, in response to these requests, department employees, with one exception, recognized that this was a state matter and did not provide any assistance to the search for the Texas legislators,
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We're going to have the first one, and then we'll see how it goes. We started the Texas Book Festival six years ago in Austin, and it's become institutionalized as an annual event at the Texas capitol. So I expect this will be very successful here. Laura Bush
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Usually, it's Texas and California and Florida. But you look at this roster and you have 'em from everywhere.
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I feel like everyone who goes to The University of Texas is blessed and lucky to be there because they're getting a chance to be as good as they can be. Alan Bean
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If there's horrible flooding in Pakistan or a horrible heat wave in Texas, we're no longer able to call it an act of God, or a natural disaster, or something like that, the way we could have through all of human history until 35 or 40 years ago. Bill McKibben
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Remember...this year has already seen more billion-dollar weather-related disasters than any year in US history. Last year was the warmest ever recorded on planet Earth. Arctic sea ice is near all-time record lows. Record floods from Pakistan to Queensland to the Mississippi basin; record drought from the steppes of Russia to the plains of Texas...This is what climate change looks like in its early stages.
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The potential for damage by this storm is significant, and the risk of flooding and tornadoes exists after the hurricane has begun to dissipate. ... Texas has learned from Louisiana's example. No one wants to repeat those mistakes.
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We've assigned it our 'High' rating, which means the vulnerability allows for code execution,
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We're going to first focus on providing the fastest execution with the most functional site we can offer. That will include news, the ability to get real-time quotes and solid price chart histories on equities and mutual funds,
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When we do what we're supposed to do, and we have execution, we're going to be hard to stop.
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When we get down inside the red zone we have to come away with points, ... There was a little confusion down there. We have some young guys playing on offense ,and the execution is something we need to get better at.
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We're executing all even at a very low level. I think that has been the malady of our team right now. Quite clearly we are not at the level of execution on half-field offense the way we should be. Right now, you should be scoring one out of every three half-field possessions, and we're nowhere near that.
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We want to stay away from penalties and turnovers and not give up big plays on defense. It's going to come down to execution and effort. Scott Smith
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I'm not your executioner. I'm not your devil and I'm not your God. I'm Charles Manson. Charles Manson
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The postponement of Dell's analysts' meeting from April to September, while bound to create more uncertainty about the timing and scope of Dell's changing model, is probably a reality check on how much Dell needs to accomplish before it can feel confident about execution and results.
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We are pleased with our overall progress in the quarter and remain intensely focused on technology leadership and operational execution.