W. C. Fields Firsts Quotations

Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

If it does not work the first time, try, try again. Then quit. No need to be an idiot.

First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.

There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.