Jerry Seinfeld Years Quotations

If you go to a bad movie, it's two hours. If you're in a bad movie, it's two years.

Well, Howard Stern has been doing his impression of me for years. It doesn't really bother me.

I've been car crazy my whole life, since I was nine years old. It's just something I'm very aware of.

Most people, you do a TV series, it ends three, four, five years later; it's a relic,

Having a 2 year old is like having a blender that you don't have the top for.

Then, finally, the third year, begging the parents, I got the Superman Halloween costume. Cardboard box, self-made top, mask included. Remember the rubber band on the back of that mask? That was a quality item there, wasn't it? That was good for about 10 seconds before it snapped out of that cheap little staple they put it in there with.

When you've been in the business 5-years, as a person, it's like you're 5-years old - like a child. 10-years and you're 10-years old, 20... Etcetera. That's how I measure maturity in this industry.

You can tell what was the best year of your father's life, because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.

Well, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.

Every day when everybody would have lunch I would do TM [Transcendental Meditation] and then I would eat while I was working because I had missed lunch but that is how I survived the 9 years [of Seinfeld], it was that 20 minutes in the middle of the day would save me.